Thursday, June 19, 2008

All the Embryos Stopped Growing

The end of the end.

64 comments:

Aimee & Hannah said...

Nooooooooooooo!!! OMG Sarah!!! :o( I'm so very sorry!!! I truely though you had a very good chance!!! *huge hugs*

Almamay said...

I'm in shock. Oh Sarah. I'm so upset for you. (((hug)))

Deb said...

wow, I am sooo sorry. There really are no words. Take care of you.

N said...

It's been a while since we have "talked" on FF but I have been following your blog. I'm so hugely giantly horribly sorry this happened. There are just no words except noooo nooooooooo noooooooooooooooooooooooo. :(

Katkun said...

I'm so very sorry, and so wish that this could have ended differently. I don't know what else to say. As you said, five years from now you'll still be a strong, healthy, happy woman, whether you're a mother or not - but I wish this cycle could have been a miraculous success.

Kat

Elowyn said...

Oh, fuck. I'm so, so sorry, Sarah. How shocking and horrible. (((you)))

gypsygrrl said...

i'm so sorry...
(((((hugs)))))

bleu said...

I am just shaken to my core and so sorry Sarah.

Tina said...

What fresh hell?

I'm sorry :(

Anonymous said...

I'm so very sorry! There aren't any other words... just heartbroken for you. (((hugs))) Kimnlogan

Rachel said...

goddamn.

i'm really, really sorry.

katty said...

I'm so, so sorry Sarah.

Mermaid said...

Oh Sarah, I am so very sorry.

Cindy said...

Oh, Sarah. I am so very sorry.

Sue said...

I'm so sorry to hear this news - it's just awful. My heart goes out to you.

calliope said...

total shock

love you.

Anonymous said...

Hi Sarah. I am so sorry. I too have struggled with IVF and have been drawn to your story and your commitment to this process. I have Prayed for you everyday.

I am so sorry. I know right now nothing really helps.

I'll continue to keep your in my Prayers.

Amy

hedgetoad said...

I'm so sorry

Three For Me said...

Oh Sarah!!! I am so sorry....there just aren't any words to help, but God Bless you...

Sarah P. said...

I am so sorry, Sarah.

The Town Criers said...

Sarah, I am so incredibly sorry.

Pepper said...

Oh Sarah. This is shocking! I am so very sorry.

Anonymous said...

OMG!!! I am so very sorry to read this!! I am so so sorry!!!
Ceecee

Miss X said...

I am so sorry, Sarah.

I don't know if this helps, but your kid is (or soon will be) out there. And this child is going to need you. You are going to be a mom, don't give up hope!!

And I think it's very interesting you had a dream about adoption last night...your subconscious was just trying to remind you not to give up on the dream of motherhood.

Anonymous said...

There are no words. I'm sorry just isn't enough. Deb (deb2you2)

Casey4 said...

I am so sorry.

Anonymous said...

Just a lurker who has been following your journey...I too have been through IUI and IVF hell for over 2 years, with only a chemical pregnancy that lasted all of a week to show for it. I am so sorry to hear that this cycle did not work out for you. Keep your head up...you will be a momma some day, and there are many ways to get there. I am now considering donor egg...some 22 year olds eggs have got to be better than my 42 year old ones...It is a process...but it is a baby I want and I realize that genetics is not the be all end all...once they put a baby in your arms, it is yours and you will love them, and you will be their momma. I wish you all the best.

orodemniades said...

Oh Sarah, words fail me. I can't even imagine how devastated you must feel...I am beyond shocked and sorry at this news.

Meg said...

I'm so very sorry.

Anniep said...

I'm shocked... and so sorry.

I guess that is closure, isn't it?

Take care of yourself. Drink lots, cry if you need to...
We're all thinking of you over on the ff recyclers board.
*hugs*

Anonymous said...

Oh gawd, Sarah. Hope is such a bitch, and that marker positive stuff ... well, just not fair. There's nothing I can say to make this better, of course, but I hope you can continue to process all of this in the spirit of your recent epiphany. But still, it just sucks and there's no way around that.

((((Sarah)))))

Jo

Celeste said...

There are just no adequate words... my heart breaks with your news. I'm so very sorry.

Anonymous said...

Oh Sarah, I'm completely shocked and speechless. It just can't be...

I'm so very, very sorry.
xoxoxoxox
-Margie

Tricia said...

Oh Sarah. I don't think there are any words apart from I'm sorry.

God I'm so sorry.

All of us recyclers are still cheering for you, even right here at the "end".

Love and hugs
Tricia xxxx

T said...

Holy fuck - I'm shocked and sickened, I can't even imagine how you're feeling. Shit, I'm so so sorry Sarah.

ms.bri said...

Oh, I am so sorry. I have been checking like crazy and just can't believe the end was so abrupt. I am sending love and strength your way. So, so sorry.

Laurie said...

Sarah I'm so sorry. Sometimes there are no words. Lots of hugs,
Laurie (from FF)

Joy said...

That sucks. I'm so sorry.

Alacrity said...

Sarah - So sorry to read your news. You have your answer, but it really sucks nonetheless. Hang in there.

Jess said...

So sorry Sarah...I wish there was more I could say. Thinking of you.

Aunt Becky said...

Here from Cali's place to say how sorry I am.

Care said...

I am so sorry Sarah!

Anonymous said...

Sarah - That is so unfair. I'm so very sorry.

Harding

Carey said...

I am so sorry... like others have said, it is so unfair.

singletracey said...

FFUUUUUUUDDDGGGE.. I am so so sorry. Not fair at all.

Kymberli said...

I'm so sorry. Those words are so inadequate, but I am sorry just the same.

irene said...

Sarah,
Truly truly sorry. Thinking of you.
Ixx

Not on Fire said...

I am so sorry for your loss.

sarah said...

so so sorry.

Anonymous said...

Feel your grief, of course. But dont forget Sarah, that your "heart cracked open".

IVF#8 is not the end, it is your beginning.

Most fondly,
Margaret (a stalker and supporter for along time, but have never posted. You have inspired and enthralled me on so many occassions with your incredible wit and gut wrenching honesty....And damn girl you can write. If poking people with needles doesnt work out, think "author".)

Jude said...

I am so sorry.

Jill said...

I am so , so sorry. I will keep you in my thoughts.

Isn't it pretty to think so said...

Nothing to say except I am so damn sorry. Will be keeping you in my thoughts. So. Sorry.

nycphoenix said...

came here from lost and found. I am so sorry

tickintime said...

I'm so sorry.

(((HUGS)))

Stephanie said...

So sorry this has happened to you.

tobacco brunette said...

I've been following you for a while, but don't think I've commented before. Just wanted you to know how sorry I am to hear your news. Just really, really sorry.

Camille said...

I too have been following your story for sometime, I come from the smc board. I am so very sorry, it is so not fair. This may be the end of this particular path but it does not have to be the end for your dream of being a mom. Sending hope, peace and love your way.

Sharon said...

It is so not fair. I am so sorry Sarah.

Please be kind to yourself.

Anonymous said...

I'm so sorry Sarah. I really am. I know how badly you wanted a bio child. I secretly wish you'd do donor embryos. I know that you were afraid that there was an extremely slim chance that you wouldn't feel the same as you would as a bio child. But, I don't think that is possible for you. You just would love the child with all your heart, it's just a leap of faith. But only you knoww what is right for you, of course. Good luck, and I'm really looking forward to reading about the next chapters in your life with our without children.

katedaphne said...

shiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit!!!! Sarah, I'm so, so sorry it went this way. Yes, your heart did open recently, but that doesn't mean you don't get to feel bad about this. Take your time, and take care of yourself. Sending many hugs south and a little east, straight to you. Love, Kate

Anonymous said...

(((Sarah))) - I'm so very sorry.

j said...

sarah...
i am so very sorry tha this journey is bookended this way, but there will be light on the other side.
thinking of you and sending you peace...
joanie, serial lurker

DC said...

I am so so sorry. Sending lots of hugs your way. *hugs*