Thursday, November 30, 2006

Fuck fuck fuck

Well, there was me all happy and optimistic. I'd done the Clear Passage Therapy, I'd got the vitamins right (or so I thought), I'd been drinking the whey protein shakes. I had nice even stimming. I thought I'd have excellent quality. I was as certain as I could be that this one would be "the one".

Out of 9 eggs, 7 were mature. 3 fertilized normally.

3.

That's less than I had last time when I only got 5 eggs in total.

3.

The universe is just fucking with me. I know, I know, it only takes one, but I shall personally track you down, come to your house in the middle of the night and stick a kitchen knife in you if you post that. I know it only takes one. But's what are the chances that I have a good one out of these three pathetic little embryos? When I've already produced 10 crappy embryos and have only got one of questionable quality in the freezer?

Damn it all.

Fuck, fuck and fuck again.

8 comments:

Carey said...

Delurking to say sorry you didn't get the number you were looking for. This shit just seems to keep getting harder & harder... damn.

Kim said...

Okay, so here's a moment of negativity about the # of eggs:

Fuckity fuck fuck!!! That sucks ass, when you had so many promising follicles. Damn, I'm so sorry, S! :(

And now the 180 degree, manic turn-around:

Hopefully one of those buggers will take. C'mon, ovum; you can do it! I'm assuming that you're doing all three, right?

katty said...

Yes that is disappointing after such a promising start. Of the other four mature eggs, did they fertilise. but abnormally (I ask because if they didn't fertilise at all you could consider ICSI next time)? BUT and I'm not being in the least bit pollyannaish and I know that this might sound annoying... BUT... the fact is you have three embryos. If you were in the UK right now they'd only let you put back two of them. You have three. You can put back three. You can put back three and we will all be hoping and hoping for you...
I'm really ver sorry for the disappointment... but I am still hoping for you and hoping for those three embryos. GO FOR IT EMBROYOS.

katty said...

BTW, by writing 'next time' I was not assuming that this cycle would fail. It's just that whenever I did any treatment I always planned ahead to the next one because I found the attitude easier to deal with than optimism!
Kx

Unknown said...

I'm sorry. And I won't say it. (Thanks for the warning, BTW.) But three is definitely better than two, or one, or zero. I will be thinking good, healthy cell division thoughts for your three embies.

namaste said...

Okay, I'm afraid of the icepick wielding Sarah too, so I won't say anything optimistic. But you can't stop me from thinking it or sending telepathic pep talks to your embryos. :)

Calliope said...

FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK
motherfucking anal massage for fucking nothing shitty 3 fertilized foot stamping. damnit!
These 3 just better be fricken mensa triplets or something.
ah!
I can only imagine how pissed you are.
in an hour & a half we can consult the sue miller oracle.
You know I am thinking of you- even tho I am being such a shit friend these days.
xoxo

art-sweet said...

Oh crap on a hot tin roof.

Dear Embryos: I am counting on you. Do not let us down.

Much love to you - hoping that the speeding ticket was actually a good - let me tell you what I went through to get you - omen, rather than the opposite.