Sunday, July 09, 2006

The wait is nearly over

One week from today I will take my last BCP. I can't believe that this interminable period of time is finally coming to an end, and that I should be on my stims shots within 2 weeks. Who'd have thought that 6 weeks could stretch out like such an eternity? Well, of course, really I suppose it's just like the summer holidays from school. As school lets out for the summer you can see these long lazy days stretching ahead of you for an eternity, and even half way through you still think there's plenty of time left, but then all of a sudden it is time to go and buy school supplies. I'm kind of in the school supplies buying phase at the moment, as I'm planning out the vitamin supplements that I'm going to take, along with the healthy things I'm going to eat and drink. It's like starting off the new school year with a mental homework planner, because of course this time I'm going to be perfectly good, and not procrastinate or indulge in destructive behaviors. Yeah right. We'll see about that. I still have a very boozy conference to get through next weekend, although I'm feeling a little more confident than usual about restricting my drinking because my best conference boozing buddy is only going to be there for 2 of the 4 days, and I'm not staying in the conference hotel because I'm cheap. I'm hoping that'll give me an excuse to leave the bar "early" (as in, before midnight) in order to stagger down the street to el cheapo inn, and not get into the "hey, lets do shots!" stage. At least, not every night.

I had a bit of an anxiety dream last night, about not being ready to go on a work trip, and nearly missing my flight. And I am very unprepared for this conference. Ahem, yes, I'm speaking at it on Saturday, so I am supposed to do some preparation other than training my liver, and I haven't reviewed my material at all. Nor have I got through the large mountain of work that has to be done before I leave. So, in order to prepare fully, today I have bought a new suitcase to feed my luggage infatuation (that I really didn't need to spend any more money on), and have come into work. Except all I've done since I got here is surf the internet, and now I'm feeling like I really need a nap. Maybe if I just work really late all next week, it'll get done somehow? I could take a file home with me and read it tonight with a glass of wine, because that's a really efficient way of working. Not. But hey, I've got a new suitcase, and that's what really counts, isn't it? It's made by the Swiss Army people, and I promise that I'll look really cool wheeling it through the airport. In fact, I think I should go home and play with it now.

What was I saying about not procrastinating....?

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