Sunday, July 29, 2007

Effing hell

Effing hell

I've gone from a tad bit disappointed to downright annoyed.

Yesterday, contrary to what I predicted, they had me drop the dose of stims and come back this morning. The news this morning was not good. Yesterday's largest follicle was 14.2. Today it was 20. I had an 18 and a 17.5 as well. So it looks like I am triggering tonight. There are 2 more follicles that may also make it (15.5 and 14.5) and an also ran (11.5).

I am pissed that this happened. To go from nice and slow and steady to ridiculously fast just makes me very mad at the world. I'm so tired of getting crazy fast development. Surely it isn't good for egg quality?  Twenty grand for 3 good sized follicles is not a great return on my investment, especially when those follicles have developed unevenly.  I had 11 antral follicles - why couldn't I have had 10 or 11 develop?  Is that too much to ask?

I know, I shouldn't be ungrateful. I'm not cancelled. I could have 4 or 5 mature eggs. I've seen it work for women with fewer. It could all still work out. And yet it's just very frustrating. Very frustrating indeed.


Anonymous said...

Hey Sarah -

That 15.5 and 14.5 will definitely make it! And you know the wild ride I had on my cycle there, and I came up with more mature ones than predicted by u/s. So I would say you will have a minimum of 5 but I hope that you are surprised with a few extras.

Plus, I think that the measuring is somewhat subjective, and, at least at my last clinic here, they measured two dimensions, and sometimes a 20 is only 14 on the other, which isn't all that big. They would add the dimensions and trigger when you had two follicles over 36 - and mine were 22 in one dimension before that happened.

Hang in there!


gabby said...

Ugh, I'm sorry you're stimming too fast. But I think you still have some good ones there and am really excited that you'll be triggering. I have everything crossed for you this cycle!

Stephanie said...

Aw, crap!

It isn't that 5 is bad (and, I agree that the other smaller ones you listed should catch up- well, except the also ran...). It's just that you were hoping for much more!

It's ok to feel ungrateful. Just because some people get less doesn't mean you can't be disappointed that you didn't get more.

So, ER will be Tuesday? I hope you have secret ninja follicles! ;-)

June Bug Momma said...

Sarah! You still have a lot of hope! You have a good number of follies to work with. I am sure the other ones will catch up and be nice and mature for your ER. I know you had hoped for a lot better outcome but things still look positive for you. My friend only had 2 mature follies with her ER and one embie to transfer and she ended up with twins! just never know! Hang in there Sarah. Good things are a coming your way!