I seek advice, oh great blogosphere. How does one really do the positive thinking thing without turning into or feeling like a loony?
Case in point: me. Well, of course, what did you expect? It's all about me. In previous cycles, I have always talked myself into positivity saying "it's going to work this time", "my eggs are growing well and are good quality, my uterus is a plushy, welcoming home", etc, etc. You know, all that jazz. With a few Ohhhmmmms thrown in for good measure. Of course, by the end of the 2 week wait, it's usually turned into "pleeeaase let it work this time".
So this time, I thought I should try things differently. I'm trying to live the feeling that it's going to work. I'm being really specific. I'm talking to the cat and telling her that "this time next year, Charlotte and Audrey will be home, and I'll be on maternity leave". Hey, I figured why not shoot for the moon? I try to imagine relaxing with them, breastfeeding (because of course in my imagination not only do I have perfectly healthy, gorgeous twin girls, but breastfeeding is an absolute breeze). I think about the stroller I'll get, and walking them around the block, going to the supermarket, getting in the car. Life, the universe and everything. Only sometimes it turns into "well, maybe Henry and Patrick will be home, or Charlotte and Henry, or just one of them" and I start feeling like an idiot. And sometimes I have to say "Babies? You know I'm just being specific, right, and that's just for ease of communication, but if you want to come through just as one person or as boys, that's really cool too. Anything you want, in your own good time. But I reserve the right to pick different names." And then I feel more of a loon.
Sigh. How on earth do you do this in a meaningful, specific way?
Tuesday, February 06, 2007
Positive thinking or loony?
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6 comments:
Probably not what you want to hear, but personally, I don't buy into that whole postive thinking thing. I just don't think i makes a bit of difference in the end. FWIW, on the cycle with Max, not only did I not think positive, I was darn right negative and moved sperm and had a consult with my RE on the day of beta. And, was sure I would m/c or he would die in utero most of the preg. So, how did I do it...I didn't...:) Good luck. Hope whether you can be positive or not and as loony as the process makes you, that finally, you get your postive beta with a live child or two at the end.
I think that positive thinking is a good thing for your wellbeing. Regardless of it happening or not, it is your mental state that makes you a happy person. I am a positive thinker and I try to stay positive at the worst times. It has helped alot in my life. Including my pregnancy, as many criticized me for being so sure I was going to have a baby in the end (for planning, buying the nursery furtniture so early, etc) For me it was a given that my daughter would arrive so I was getting ready for her. I was not disappointed and if I had lost her, the happy times were happy anyways!
Hi Sarah,
It's Jill....from FF site. I keep up with your blog and I just love your little rants. I especially liked todays 6 things about you! Physics huh? :-)
Anyway, I've been out of touch from FF as I just can't bring myself to continue to pay the dues when I'm not TTC. But, I was very eager to hear how everyone is doing. Especially Stephanie and Candi. They are probably due pretty soon!
Do you have any news on them. Could you email me...if you don't mind??? I'm at themaurers95@myacc.net
Glad to hear you have a plan at Big New Clinic!!!
Jill
I think being positive is in your nature. If you didn't have hope you wouldn't be going through this.
As for trying something different - something that I want to try is actually writing down my wishes. Maybe even drawing them or making a collage. Just keep putting it out in the universe. It may make us loons - but at least we will be hopeful loons!
That naturopath I talked to told me to start visualizing in the positive. He said think about being pregnant, breastfeeding my baby, etc. Until he said that I didn't really think it was "ok" to do so. I thought it would get my hopes up and it wouldn't be a good idea. Well, I have found it quite fun to have these fantasies. I find that they also put me in a more positive and peaceful mood. That can only be helpful for me.
I love your "positive" chats with your cat. I think that's perfect! Don't feel looney. You are doing a great thing for your mind, your body and especially for your hormonal and immune system.
Hope you get a BFP and that it all becomes a blissful reality!
-Cindy
If I knew, I'd tell you. But I simply want you to know that there are other loony people out there doing the same positive speeches to themselves. I don't know--it makes me feel good to talk about it while I'm doing it even if the let down is bad afterwards. I mean, the letdown was going to feel bad regardless of what I did beforehand, right?
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