Wednesday, May 09, 2007

So, the Mother's Day post

Mother's Day, oh Mother's Day, why are you always such a kick in the teeth?

If there's one holiday that I dislike more than Mother's Day, I can't think of it right now. Valentine's Day comes a close second, but mostly I just find it kind of stupid. Mother's Day makes me downright sad.

First there's the fact that my own mother has died. Every year I have to watch commercials trying to lure people to buy stupid trinkets for their moms, or advertising some Sunday brunch special that I'm not going to go to. Then there's the fact that I'm infertile, and may never be a mom. Sure, I try to hold out hope, but sometimes it is hard. No mother + not being a mother is a double whammy for an infertile, I think. Then there's the fact that I'm still single, so have no mother-in-law or husband to put some of my emotional energy on to. Then there's the fact that my aunt, who is more of a mom to me than anyone else, has a child that refuses contact with the family so she has her own sadness over Mother's Day and every time I get her flowers or something I worry that I'm just making her remember that I'm not the true daughter who should be doing that for her.

Mother's Day itself, as a concept, is not so bad. Yes, we should honor the mothers in our society, and our own mothers in particular. They are worthy of thanks, and at least one day a year of being treated as special people. That's all fine and dandy. It's the TV ads that get me. That make you feel that you are only normal if you are out buying your mom a camcorder or something. And seriously, who does that? I've never met a mom who would like a camcorder for Mother's Day over a nice meal, a hug and maybe some flowers. And then of course, there's the whole church thing. I'd like to maybe start going to church again, and had thought of going this Sunday. Until I remembered it was Mother's Day, so that's what the service is bound to be about. Which will probably make me cry. What's a girl to do?

Oh well, come Monday it'll be over again for another year. I will, as I do with everything, endure.


calliope said...

I thought about when I was musing on Mother's much it MUST suck to have a Mother that has passed and not yet be a Mother.
The more I think about it- the more I think the holiday is geared towards Men. They are the ones out buying stupid electronics and shit, they are the ones that will totally succumb to the guilt and buy the fancy chocolates...ugh
As for me- I bought GM some cheap German dessert wine and am going to get the oil changed in Mother's car & I am doing it not because there is a DAY that says I should but because I am kind like that.
um...what am I trying to even say?

Larisa said...

Wow...I hadn't thought about how tough it would be with the double dose of your mom having passed away. Yeah...I wouldn't start going to church again *this* week.

Thanks so much for your comment on my blog.

Care said...

I hadn't thought about that either. Sorry that Mother's Day is another painful reminder of what you don't have. That sucks.

Anonymous said...

Yeah, definitely do not go to church this Sunday. I hated going on Mother's Day b/c it honored all the moms and I wasn't (and very much wanted to be) a mom. It will definitely make you cry.

Hopefully your aunt will find some cheer in spending time with you and you with her. I bet she appreciates it way more than you think.

Hopefully Monday comes quickly for you. Hang in there!


mimi said...

I'm sure your aunt appreciates whatever you do for her on mother's day. It sounds like you are there for each other and that is important to both of you.

As for you, I hope you go to the beach or something and try to treat yourself. You've been through a lot lately. Make this your day to take care of yourself -- you deserve it! If possible, try to think of it as a day for all women, not just mothers. And for god's sake stay away from church!

Sara said...

Yeah, that is a real double-whammy. I think that it's wonderful that you do something for your aunt on mother's day, though. I'm sure it means a lot to her.

Definitely avoid church. This is not the week to go back.

Monday will be here soon, thankfully.

Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.